Pete Wilson, one of our pastors at the Nashville campus of  CrossPoint Church has been doing a series on Shattered Dreams.  Today, the lesson was on “Waiting on God”.  There were so many good nuggets in the message that it was almost hard to keep up with my notetaking.  I kept thinking about things going on in my life-even right now-where I really need the words he spoke today.

In my last post, I talked about some radical things I’m going after both personally and professionally.  And since writing it, I’ve been actively working on each thing.  My body definitely feels the effects of more rigorous exercise.  And the career pursuits are moving along. It’s been an exciting time all around, as I feel the inertia of moving forward.  The hardest part has been in asking God for a radical assignment.  Because the “homework” I’m doing right now…sucks.  My little girl has been struggling for 22 straight days with migraine-like symptoms.  We’ve been to countless doctors; she’s been poked and prodded, she’s had fluids put in and blood taken out.  And she’s been put on medications that have made even our pharmacist nervous.  And Nothing has worked.  At this point, I’m emotionally exhausted.  It has noticeably altered our lives, and has caused me many tears as I watch her struggle with the pain. There are moments here and there of her sweet, happy personality.  But the first and last words I hear each day are about how bad it hurts.

Pete asked a really hard question this morning.  When times get tough, will we trust or control? Though I’ve been saying that I was believing God for a change, and have been asking Him daily for a break in the pain, I’ve mainly been aggressively pursuing treatment and “driving the bus” to try to find an answer for why this is happening.  Don’t get me wrong–I absolutely believe in doctors and medicine…but first and foremost I know I should be looking up for guidance.  In our sermon notes today was this point: Hope does not come only from believing God’s power, but also from accepting and trusting His timing. Nothing about what’s been happening with her is normal.  I think it’s time for me to move from trying to control what’s happening and truly trust Him to protect her and heal her.  Because I know that God heals. And I have to trust that He made her for a purpose that’s not going to be destroyed by this pain.  I asked for a radical assignment, and this ordeal has definitely tested my faith.

Does this hit you in any area your of life?  Where do you need to let go and let God?

P.S. If you are running low on hope, or feeling that life hasn’t turned out the way you thought it would, please check out this website about Pete’s new book, Plan B.  I’m reading it now, and it’s the perfect message for this journey.

Image credit: www.foxyblunt.com

Some people hate change.  They get nervous about rearranged furniture or unplanned travel.  Not me.   I need new seasons in life–new responsibilities, and challenges.   For about two months, I’ve been feeling the need to “shake things up”, but just couldn’t figure out where the “itch” was.  I realized it wasn’t just one area of life–it’s everywhere.  I’m ready for an Overhaul.  And you know what?  I’m excited!

Here are just a few things I’m doing that will Definitely challenge me in this next season:

I ordered Insanity. Yes, I am insane.  Let’s see if I’m still breathing the week after it arrives.  Clearly, the results will be immediate.

I’m reevaluating my work life. I love where I work and can’t imagine leaving. I know I have to be intentional-it’s not change just to have something new.  It’s change to see how I might positively impact the company in a new way.

I’m taking the next step on a business idea. I have strong entrepreneurial tendencies and know what I’m capable of when it’s my butt on the line.  The big win?  It’s something that will be successful while also allowing me to keep my career.  Can’t beat that.

I’m asking God for a radical assignment.  Call me crazy, but from the time I was a little girl, I’ve asked that God ask me to do something big.  And when I look at my life, all I see is a place where things have become comfortable.   For others, that’s likely the picture of perfection.  For me, it means I’ve really missed it somewhere.  I  don’t need to lose it all to think God has used me, but I do think big faith means change, and I don’t want to look back on a life that was just comfy.  I want to know I really made a difference.

Your turn.  Are you doing anything radical these days?  If so, do you love it or does it stress you out?

Persistence (AP Images)

Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan ‘Press On’ has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. –Calvin Coolidge

On Monday evening, I was flipping between two shows.  I didn’t realize that the Olympic sport being shown was called “ice dancing” (I just thought it was pairs skating), but I’d seen the Canadians as they qualified over the weekend and wanted to see them go for gold in the finals.  Yes, the costumes were flambouyant; and yes, the dances lacked the jumps we love to watch, but I didn’t care.  I was captivated by the sheer determination it must have taken every Olympic hopeful to get there.  The announcer stated that a coach had paired the Canadians at ages seven and nine.  Imagine giving up so much and practically living your life with someone else beginning in second or third grade because of a dream.

When I look at my own life, it’s clear to see that persistence was hard-wired in my circuitry.  And that’s both good and bad.  It’s great when we go after a goal, or start a new hobby, or decide that we’re going to help someone.  Something inside pushes us not to give up.  On the bad side, it can show up as needyness and competition, both of which hamper our ability to grow and affect change.

What is it within us that makes us strive for more? To reach for something that allows us to make the world a better place?  I think it’s specific passions born by God into each of us.  And what we do with them shapes who we are and alters the world around us.  Powerful stuff.

I was joyfully tearful when the Canadians won that night.  It was wonderful to see their persistence pay off.

What are you passionately persistent about?

Photo credit Peter Daveney

I admit it.  Sometimes I compare myself to others.  I wish I managed my blog and connected with new people as well as Lindsey does.  To have the effortless grace Tami does would be wonderful.  And how I’d love to wake up every day knowing exactly what I was made for, the way Britt does.

But I am not these fabulous women.  I’m me.  Not that there’s anything wrong with being me.  I know I have my own unique gifts and talents–it’s just that sometimes I wish I possessed the unique talents other people already have.  Wouldn’t that be fun-a sort of “widget”  list of great attributes we could add to ourselves?

We all struggle with “Keeping up with the Joneses”.  There’s a need to be seen as having it all together, staying on track with our career goals, having the perfect marriage, and being the perfect parents.  As I’ve gotten older, there are a few lessons beginning to take shape:

1. Titles don’t make the person-Early in my career, I set some serious “over achiever” goals for myself.  And I worked way too hard to get them. A few years’ back, I realized I didn’t care about the ladder anymore.  I cared more about being passionate about what I do.
2. Being passionate is a must-The business cards, the paycheck, being part of a leadership team…none of that can ever add up to “enough” when you are alone with your thoughts if you don’t love what you do. Same goes for who we love, who we’re friends with, and what hobbies we spend time doing.  We’re just burning hours without passion.
3. Being happy is worth the risk-If you aren’t in a career, relationship, or church you love and are fed by, make room for a different possibility.  Be willing to be uncomfortable for a little while in order to be happy in the end.
4. There are no perfect people- We all have strengths–and weakenessess–that make us who we are.  And while I may see characteristics in others I’m motivated to add to my own list, I know that God created each of us for a specific purpose and without those inherent traits, we would be unable to fulfill our purpose.

” Why compare yourself to others?  No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.”-author unknown

Do you struggle with this too?